When it comes to dating, I have two jokes about myself. The first is I have lots of running shoes and I’m not afraid to use them, and the second is the words ‘Flight Risk” should be tattooed on my forehead. As Geoffrey Chaucer said, “Many a true word is spoken in jest.”
I’ve just finished the first three months of a Sex Love and Relationship Coaching Certification Program offered by Layla Martin. The focus of the first three months was personal transformation and during those three months I came face to face with my inner escape artist. All I did was watch the introductory lecture to a module on trauma and before the lecture was even over, she had her running shoes on and was half way down the street. I know why this part of me exists and what she’s trying to accomplish. Some days I can even find humour in how seriously she takes her job. But she’s also standing between me and what I really want.
It’s difficult for me to admit relationships are a challenge for me. I would rather believe I have them figured out and choose another arena to learn my life lessons in. I would also rather argue with or ignore my inner escape artist and pretend with sheer determination and perseverance I can manage a relationship without her ever showing up. But that’s not working. So I’ve shifted my focus to acceptance. I’ll continue to learn, but from this point forward my learning will include all parts of me.